Where Has Humanity Gone?

I have come to the conclusion, if I had it to do over again, I would not put a dog in a nursing home!  I definitely would not put another human being in a nursing home!

I have documented everything, that others have done to my brother J.R. during his diagnosis of dementia 3 years ago.  If you read my documentary of all the unkind things other human beings have done to J.R. it would curl your toes!  I know no one really cares to read anything too dramatic, sad, or concerning real life.  This post is for ME, to vent, so I do not march out into the world and punch someone in their big fat, unkind nose!

I will say one thing about my precious brother – Medical problem number 3 in these last 3 weeks involves – An antibiotic resistant staph infection from minor surgery in the hospital. He is in quarantine at a different nursing home.  It took them a week to discover this staph infection and they did not tell me he had it until they quarantined him at the nursing home the day they admitted him.

Has my brother gone down hill physically and mentally much faster than expected? MOST ASSUREDLY!  Am I angry, I most assuredly am.  What a battle I have fought for 3 years, it would drive any human being into the ground.

Storm Clouds on the Horizon

This week we have seen some very bad weather in Arkansas.  Tuesday evening we sat at my daughter’s house, watching the weather forecast,  waiting to see if we needed to go into the underground storm cellar.  Luckily the tornado warning was cancelled for our area and all was well.  Last night, Thursday, there were more warnings in the state and the wind blew these storm clouds our way.  Luckily, once again we dodged the bullet, as the old saying goes.  We have lost several people in Arkansas due to tornadoes and floods this Spring, and that is usually the case.  Oklahoma and Texas have had some very devastating storms this Spring and many deaths.  Mother Nature’s fury is unforgiving.

Reflecting on Life

Do you find as you get older that you begin to reflect on your life?  Does life seem to be slipping away too quickly?  Does it seem like you were just 18 years old yesterday and ready to leave your parents house? The next thing you know you are 40, then 50 and on up the age ladder you wander. As this life passes quickly do you reflect on what you have done, or how happy you have been?  Do you wonder when you will be gone and become only a memory in someone’s mind?  Most of us with a little age under our belts do think about the end of our life.

 

 

 

 

At  times I look through picture albums (yes, some of us still have those) and review the life I have lived to this point.  I think, wow, I have had a busy life, but where has it gone. You wonder how many days or years you have left on this earth.  You question whether you have spent your life doing what was expected of you, if you helped others enough. You think did I love enough, was I happy, was I kind, was I the person I should have been.

 

Memories of loved ones that I have lost flood my mind.  Then I think of those who are still here, those I love, those I can still help get through the tragic times, the happy times.

Take the years God gives you on this earth and live them in the best possible way.  Never take life for granted. Life is fragile.  Live today to the fullest, because as horrible as it may be to think about it, we may not have tomorrow.

Smile – Keep On Trying

This is a beautiful park in Central Arkansas near the new nursing home where I am placing my brother J.R.  I signed papers for an hour yesterday to have him placed in a dementia unit.  There is such sadness and so many tears, these last 3 years, trying to do what is best for a person I have loved for so long.  A person who does not know me.

I thought of the song “Smile” which has been sang by so many great people over the years: Richie Rosato, Judy Garland, Nat King Cole, Josh Groban.  Following are the words of the song “Smile,” which greatly touch my heart.

SMILE

Smile though your heart is aching.  Smile even though it’s breaking.  When there are clouds in the sky you’ll get by.

If you smile through your fear and sorrow.  Smile and maybe tomorrow you’ll see the sun come shining through.  For you.

Light up your face with gladness.  Hide every trace of sadness.  Although a tear may be ever so near.

That’s the time you must keep on trying.  Smile, what’s the use of crying.  You’ll find that life is worthwhile.  If you just SMILE.

When you deal with dementia there are so many times you feel guilty when you say to yourself, “I don’t want to do this anymore, I cannot handle this anymore.”   But, you keep on trying and smile though your heart is breaking!

Pictures of Mother Nature

The Power of Prayer

Each and every time you think you are going to catch that close up picture of a buzzard in flight, that buzzard sails away in another direction.  Try capturing one of these if you have motion sickness like me – a few staggers here and there and this was the results. Good job huh!!!!!  Ha

The erratic flight of this buzzard reminds me of what I have been going through these last 10 days with my brother J.R. and his dementia.  I have found a lot of sad stories on-line and on blogs of families dealing with loved ones with dementia.  Breaks my heart to read these stories, such sorrow and stress.

The last 10 days for me have been full of anger, sorrow, and stress.  I took my aggressive personality out of the closet, stood up for myself, did not let anyone walk all over me.  Did I accomplish things – yep (but only with God’s help)!  Got medical issues solved for my brother, found out why he was violent (sever bladder infection and abscess in that area), and located another nursing home with a dementia unit.  All the prayers of my family and friends were answered. Thank you God was the first thing I said when that last phone call gave me the good news of a better place for my brother to live.  Never underestimate the power of God.

Loneliness

I remember ten years ago when I sustained a severe concussion.  Silly me, I ran into a steel beam with my forehead.  I was so dizzy for a month I could not get out of bed.  For month two and three I stayed home laying on the couch to recuperate.  It was a lonely, miserable time in my life.  My husband was my caregiver, but he had things that required his attention and he was home only part of the time.

As I laid on that couch I watched an old white horse in the hillside pasture across the road. I could tell the horse was old, very lonely and neglected.  I never saw the owner interact with that horse and I spent hours watching.  As the weeks passed I would find myself talking to that horse in my mind and occasionally out loud.  I would tell him I understood.  I had such compassion for this lonely old horse.  Near the end of the two months, I laid on that couch, I saw a young, frisky, brown horse appear in the pasture with the white horse. I was thrilled, “Whitey” as I called him had companionship at last.  I saw Whitey try to interact with this brown horse for days, but the brown horse would not pay any attention to Whitey.  After a week of rejection the brown horse was taken away. Once again Whitey looked sad and lonely. Whitey died a few months later.  Ten years later I still think of Whitey and feel pain because he was neglected.  I do not know why people have animals if they are not going to give them love.

As I laid on the couch I would think of crossing my front field, going across the road to the fence to talk to Whitey and pet his nose.  Animals experience loneliness exactly as people experience being lonely.

Ten years later I am dizzy and housebound from a fall where I landed face first.  Once again I have compassion for an animal.  There is a baby rabbit who lives in my yard.  I call him Streak, because he can really go from Point A to B in record time.  Streak had a sibling that he played with that disappeared in a few days.  Streak’s mom has gone on her way and Streak is alone.  Streak touches my heart, because I feel he has to be lonely.  I watch him try to interact with the adult rabbits, but they shun him.  I would pet
Streak if he were not a wild animal.  How sad to be alone.

If you have a friend or acquaintance, young or old who is lonely, well or ill, depressed, a shut-in, in the hospital go visit them.  Loneliness does not help anyone thrive in their life. Loneliness causes young and old people to take their own lives.  Don’t let this happen to someone you know.  Be the salve that soothes their lonely soul.  Do something to alleviate someone’s loneliness.  God did not put us on this earth to be alone.  And while you are at it, pet your dog, cat, or horse.

Imagine the Possibilities

 

Can you imagine the possibilities of a better world.  There are so many negative people on this earth.  I sat here trying to think of one person I knew who was kind, generous, totally happy, and who amazed me with their positive attitude.  I thought of one lady, she is a school teacher.  Every time I encounter this precious lady she greets me with warmth and a happy smile on her face.  She greets everyone with her big smile, she is a very kind, compassionate person.  A perfect person to be a teacher, a friend, an inspiration,

When I let negative thoughts enter my mind I know that I can be that better person and discard that negativity.  If I wish to create a better person within myself I have to work toward that goal.  There is a Chinese Proverb:  “Deal with the faults of others as gently as your own.”

I found a quote by an unknown author that made me stop and think: “One day your life will flash before your eyes.  Make sure it is worth watching.”  Imagine the possibilities of your life being a story worth watching.  A story that truly inspires others.

If I improve my outlook on life and my actions I can make this world a better place in which to live. I can improve my life and the lives of those around me.  It takes one step at a time and loads of patience to change.  I can work on that positive attitude, acquire a kinder demeanor, and create untold possibilities for a happier life.

Mother Teresa said: “Kind words are short and easy to speak, but their echoes are totally endless.”  Kind words travel far and last for a very long time.  Just think how happy you feel when kind words are spoken to you by others.

We will never eradicate all of the angry, mean, hateful, unkind people from this earth, but changing ourselves can add another good person to this world.  If we change then the possibility of changing others can be achieved.  Do not expect others to listen to you and change their lives if there is negativity in your life.

There are two things others will truly see that stand out in your life.  The things you do to other people and the things you do for other people.  We all need to be more kind, more generous, more caring and extremely compassionate people. God expects us to be good, moral people.  I often sit and dream about how wonderful it would be on this earth if the world was filled with more perfect and compassionate human beings.

The possibility of each of us changing the life of one other person for the better, is achievable.  Think of the snowball effect that can happen by passing your compassion from one person to another and watching it rub off on others..  Envision the possibilities of kinder people and a better world in which to live.  One line in John Lennon’s  song “Imagine” says, “Imagine all the people living life in peace.” ♥♥♥♥♥♥

Be Kind – Be Nice

My Mother instilled this old saying in my brain all through my childhood:  “If you can’t say nothin nice, don’t say nothin at all.”

As an adult when I’m in a situation with others and I start to say the wrong thing, I think of Mom and this old saying.  Then, I shut my mouth and I don’t say a thing.

There have been many silly, unkind, irritating people who have aggravated me in my life. When this type person talks to me and seems to be a moron, I shut my mouth. Then I tell myself to consider the source and let all their ignorant actions and words roll off my back. I keep my mouth shut.

Oh, don’t get me wrong, I can stand up for myself.  I have strong opinions and a very big mouth.  But, if the issue is stupid, leads to nothing, and harms no one, I shut my mouth.

There is a belief from at least 200 years ago – If you don’t have common horse sense to guide you then you are not very smart!  You, see horses are smarter than most of us know.  Education does not make a person smart.  What makes a person smart is being able to use common horse sense to solve problems in a calm, rational way.  Work toward a peaceful outcome.  There is too much unkindness and rage in this world today.

So be kind, be nice and use your brain correctly.  Use common horse sense.  When something unkind, or unnecessary tries to come out of your mouth, close your lips.

Hot Springs, Arkansas

Thought I would show all of you some more photos of my relaxing trip to Hot Springs last month.  They have some wonderful buildings with grand architectural features.  The following photo is the magnificent entrance to the Arlington Hotel.

This picture of the Arlington is taken about 2 blocks from the Hotel.

This is the front of the Quapaw Bath House on Bath House Row.  The bath houses are on one side of the street and small shops for buying gifts and souvenirs are on the other side of the street.

I do not know what this building is used for, it is on Main Street.  I thought the carvings and details on this building were beautiful.

This sign is near the visitor center in the middle of the downtown area.  You can pick up some good maps of the surrounding areas and good attractions to visit.

Sometimes when there is too much traffic and the driver cannot stop for that perfect Photo, you have to snap some of the beautiful buildings on the move.  Well, at least you got to see the 3rd of 4th floors.

On the hillside behind and above the bath houses you find these bricked paths that you can venture along for a nice stroll.  These paths meander for miles above Hot Springs. There is water from small hot springs coming out of the hillsides and a view of Bath House Row from above.  There are benches here and there to stop and rest, lots of shade, and depending on the time, many people to meet and greet from countries all over the world. Along the pathways you find tables, with tiled checker boards embedded in concert. Anyone can participate in a friendly game of checkers.  This is a wonderful town to visit and don’t miss taking a Duck Boat ride on Lake Hamilton. (just watch out for the poison ivy vines if you venture off the paths – 1/2  of Arkansas is poison ivy.)